Chuck Norris on Obama's top 'faith moments'

U.S. News and World Report reported it, but Chuck says most aren't "faith moments" at all.

Horoscopes that don't foretell

Here at The Daily Planet we have to edit standing features days in advance. Today, we got a week's worth of horoscopes.

Any seer worth her salt ought to be able to send us horoscope columns two, three years in advance. Now, that'd be worth reading.

At a previous paper where I was wire editor/page designer/headline writer/page proofer all the horoscopes began "Born today, ..." then said something about the person born on that day. We wrote a headline, "Born today, you are bright and industrious" or whatever.

I always hoped for the day the copy read: "Born today, you aren't gullible, or easily taken in by charlatans." My headline would have been: "Born today, you weren't born yesterday."

Alas, it never happened. I guess that's because those people are reading their horoscopes.